It’s important to understand why we need strong families around us and to nurture our relationships with parents, children, siblings and spouses. Many of us have caused great harm to our family in the past. Forgiveness and healing will take work, time and patience.
The value of family is something that should be a visible part of our transformation process. We may not have valued our relationships in the past, because we were brought up in a dysfunctional home, or we had lack of attention or love growing up and those wounds stayed with us through our teens and adult lives.
We find encouragement in knowing that the restoration of our families can begin with us. Once we understand the need for a viable, healthy and nurturing family, we can take the steps required to strengthen those important relationships.
- What is the source of the problem? We must address the problem right at its source. This requires complete honesty and transparency. This also may be the most difficult and intimidating step to take, but once the source of the problem is identified, the other steps will be easier to take. As you look into relationship problems it may help to get input or wise counsel from a trusted third party such as your pastor or other leader in your church.
- What pain has this caused me, others? We must acknowledge the pain a certain behavior has caused us and others. The longer we keep these thoughts hidden, the more we hurt and the angrier we can become. It is healthy and necessary to clearly communicate the damage that was done from past choices.
- What are the destructive habits? How do we break them? We are all creatures of habit. We need to study signs of what causes us to fall back into destructive habits. Once we determine that, we can investigate how we can prevent and break these habits.
- Everyone is given the choice to forgive, no matter how much pain and damage was inflicted. Forgiveness leads to freedom, freedom from painful memories and thoughts towards others. Relationships cannot grow and prosper without forgiveness; they are stunted without it.
- A strong family unites and lifts each other up. We should look for ways to compromise with our family and show signs of love and support if we desire the same for ourselves from our parents, children, siblings and wives.
Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. Colossians 3:13